There seems to be an opinion that relaxing prAsa and yati
restrictions in telugu meters is a strict no-no. I can agree
with that to a large extent, certainly more on prAsa, which is
more visible, (and adds a very nice flair to the poem) than on
yati, which is a bit elusive, and is seen only by the cognoscenti.
Yet, just as the expert artisan spends much time even on parts of
the work that people rarely see, I will agree that a good poet
ought to follow both prAsa and yati.
That gives me an out, doesn't it! I claim to be no "good poet",
just an apprentice, who is still learning the trade. When I do
manage to satisfy both the requirements, I do feel a tinge
of satisfaction.
prAsa yatulaTanna rOsambutO kAdu,
cEtakAni tanamu, cEva lEdu!
sarwa lakshaNa yuta SArdUlamunu wrAya
kOrikundi gAni, teerikEdi?
All of this started, with my quest to find a poem written
"strictly according to rules, including prAsa and yati", but
using mostly English words, if not ALL of them. The fact that I
presented some examples (including mine) is only to show that
the quest is still a quest.
In Atlanta TANA ashTAvadhAnam, adiyan was a panelist, handling
"aprastuta prasangamu". When asked to compose a poem using
mostly English, the avadhAni demurred, saying that he is not that
conversant with English and gave a lukewarm piece, in ATaveladi,
the first two lines of which I don't remember, but ending with
sensu ginsu lEni nAn-sensu TAkEla!
bADu hAbitaddi, panDitunDA!
If ever someone wrote one, it would have been either Arudra or SrISrI.
(BTW, Arudra was in the hall that day at TANA, in a wheel chair). But,
anya dESya padamulanu koddigA vADi
padya racana cEsi pEru gAnci
naTTi Adhunikulu Arudra, SrISrI-lu
vaTTi ingileeshu vADalEdu
viSwanAtha satyanArAyaNa SrImadrAmAyaNa kalpavRksham kAdu,
Andhra praSasti lO kUDA English mATalu vADalEdu. kAnee, vEyi
paDagalalO, dharmArAwu arundhatitO, "nuvu bottigA superstitious
ayipOtunnAvE" anTADu. akkaDa sandarbham undi, A mATa anipincaTAniki.
ayinA, "cAdastam" anna mATa vADi kAvalasina ardhaanni akkaDa Ayana
ApAdinci unDavaccunu. adokkatE mATa kAdu, inka ennO unDavaccu, A
pustakamlO.
If one can use an occasional English word in prose, why not in
poetry? There are occasions where it is unwarranted. Occasions when
it plain should not. I think I have heard some "urdu" words in
the Hindi TV epic, mahAbhArat. Is "musAfir" one such? I don't think
such is the case with Ramanand Sagar's epic, "rAmAyaN". What is the
propriety of Urdu words in say, mahAbhArat? They were "jarring" to me.
But a friend of mine defended the usage. (Don't remember the
rationale). Could you imagine hearing in any of our pourANika movies,
such (now) common place words, such as rODDu, pEparu? If you say they
were non-existent at that time, how about "adhArTee", "Asupatri"?
However, to reiterate my plight,
prAsa yatula nanni pATincunantaTi
paTima lEdu, nAku guTaka paDavu
namali mringuTakunu nalavi kAnantaTi
pedda mudda vOle pariharintu!
inglIshlO geetAnjali
banglA kavi SEkharunDu bAgA rAsen
inglAnDu poyeTokanDu te
lunglO vRttAnni vADalEDanTArA?
bhArateeya maina bhAvamulanu para
dESa bhAshalandu telupa bOme?
ATaveladi, kanda, tETageetula nAngla
bhAsha yandu wrAya dOsamEmi?
Ramakrishna
PS: As I was scripting this, came up with the following line as a
mental doodle. What is the meter therein?
jersee juvvAdi ramaNanu nE neppuDU cUdalEdE!
and how about the following?
lakshinnarasu parAnandi miDweshTu OhayO vAsi
sArAnni vaDabOsi kAci tA kemishTree meeda wrAyu
mandAra, jillEDu, vEpa, gOngUra, baccali, kanda
ceekAkuLam bAsa lOnu, Edaina okaTEnu ganda!
I don't think PALANA will agree with my conclusion.